However, the egg only got larger and larger, and more and morehuman: when she had come within a few yards of it, she saw thatit had eyes and a nose and mouth; and when she had come close toit, she saw clearly that it was HUMPTY DUMPTY himself. `It can'tbe anybody else!' she said to herself. `I'm as certain of it, asif his name were written all over his face.'

It might have been written a hundred times, easily, on thatenormous face. Humpty Dumpty was sitting with his legs crossed,like a Turk, on the top of a high wall -- such a narrow one thatAlice quite wondered how he could keep his balance -- and, as hiseyes were steadily fixed in the opposite direction, and he didn'ttake the least notice of her, she thought he must be a stuffedfigure after all.

`And how exactly like an egg he is!' she said aloud, standingwith her hands ready to catch him, for she was every momentexpecting him to fall.

`It's

`I said you

`Some people,' said Humpty Dumpty, looking away from her asusual, `have no more sense than a baby!'

Alice didn't know what to say to this: it wasn't at all likeconversation, she thought, as he never said anything to

`Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall:

`Don't stand there chattering to yourself like that,' HumptyDumpty said, looking at her for the first time,' but tell me yourname and your business.'

`My

`It's a stupid name enough!' Humpty Dumpty interruptedimpatiently. `What does it mean?'

`

`Of course it must,' Humpty Dumpty said with a sort laugh: `

`Why do you sit out here all alone?' said Alice, not wishing tobegin an argument.

`Why, because there's nobody with me!' cried Humpty Dumpty.`Did you think I didn't know the answer to

`Don't you think you'd be safer down on the ground?' Alice wenton, not with any idea of making another riddle, but simply in hergood-natured anxiety for the queer creature. `That wall is so

`What tremendously easy riddles you ask!' Humpty Dumpty growledout. `Of course I don't think so! Why, if ever I

`To send all his horses and all his men,' Alice interrupted,rather unwisely.

`Now I declare that's too bad!' Humpty Dumpty cried, breakinginto a sudden passion. `You've been listening at doors -- andbehind trees -- and sown chimneys -- or you couldn't have knownit!'

`I haven't, indeed!' Alice said very gently. `It's in a book.'

`Ah, well! They may write such things in a

`Yes, all his horses and all his men,' Humpty Dumpty went on.`They'd pick me up again in a minute,

`I'm afraid I can't quite remember it,' Alice said verypolitely.

`In that case we start fresh,' said Humpty Dumpty, `and it's myturn to choose a subject -- ' (`He talks about it just as if itwas a game!' thought Alice.) `So here's a question for you. Howold did you say you were?'

Alice made a short calculation, and said `Seven years and sixmonths.'

`Wrong!' Humpty Dumpty exclaimed triumphantly. `You neversaid a word like it!'

`I though you meant "How old

`If I'd meant that, I'd have said it,' said Humpty Dumpty.

Alice didn't want to begin another argument, so she saidnothing.

`Seven years and six months!' Humpty Dumpty repeatedthoughtfully. `An uncomfortable sort of age. Now if you'd asked

`I never ask advice about growing,' Alice said Indignantly.

`Too proud?' the other inquired.

Alice felt even more indignant at this suggestion. `I mean,'she said, `that one can't help growing older.'

`

`What a beautiful belt you've got on!' Alice suddenly remarked.

(They had had quite enough of the subject of age, she thought:and if they really were to take turns in choosing subjects, itwas her turn now.) `At least,' she corrected herself on secondthoughts, `a beautiful cravat, I should have said -- no, a belt,I mean -- I beg your pardon!' she added in dismay, for HumptyDumpty looked thoroughly offended, and she began to wish shehadn't chosen that subject. `If I only knew,' the thought toherself, 'which was neck and which was waist!'

Evidently Humpty Dumpty was very angry, though he said nothingfor a minute or two. When he

`It is a --

`I know it's very ignorant of me,' Alice said, in so humble atone that Humpty Dumpty relented.

`It's a cravat, child, and a beautiful one, as you say. It's apresent from the White King and Queen. There now!'

`Is it really?' said Alice, quite pleased to find that she

`They gave it me,' Humpty Dumpty continued thoughtfully, as hecrossed one knee over the other and clasped his hands round it,`they gave it me -- for an un-birthday present.'

`I beg your pardon?' Alice said with a puzzled air.

`I'm not offended,' said Humpty Dumpty.

`I mean, what

`A present given when it isn't your birthday, of course.'

Alice considered a little. `I like birthday presents best,'she said at last.

`You don't know what you're talking about!' cried HumptyDumpty. `How many days are there in a year?'

`Three hundred and sixty-five,' said Alice.

`And how many birthdays have you?'

`One.'

`And if you take one from three hundred and sixty-five, whatremains?'

`Three hundred and sixty-four, of course.'

Humpty Dumpty looked doubtful. `I'd rather see that done onpaper,' he said.

Alice couldn't help smiling as she took out her memorandum-book, and worked the sum for him:

Humpty Dumpty took the book, and looked at it carefully. `Thatseems to be done right -- ' he began.

`You're holding it upside down!' Alice interrupted.

`To be sure I was!' Humpty Dumpty said gaily, as she turned itround for him. `I thought it looked a little queer. As I wassaying, that

`Certainly,' said Alice.

`I don't know what you mean by "glory,"' Alice said.

Humpty Dumpty smiled contemptuously. `Of course you don't --till I tell you. I meant "there's a nice knock-down argument foryou!"'

`But "glory" doesn't mean "a nice knock-down argument,"' Aliceobjected.

`When

`The question is,' said Alice, `whether you

`The question is,' said Humpty Dumpty, `which is to be master -- that's all.'

Alice was too much puzzled to say anything, so after a minuteHumpty Dumpty began again. `They've a temper, some of them --particularly verbs, they're the proudest -- adjectives you can doanything with, but not verbs -- however,

`Would you tell me, please,' said Alice `what that means?`

`Now you talk like a reasonable child,' said Humpty Dumpty,looking very much pleased. `I meant by "impenetrability" thatwe've had enough of that subject, and it would be just as wellif you'd mention what you mean to do next, as I suppose you don'tmean to stop here all the rest of your life.'

`That's a great deal to make one word mean,' Alice said in athoughtful tone.

`When I make a word do a lot of work like that,' said HumptyDumpty, `I always pay it extra.'

`Oh!' said Alice. She was too much puzzled to make any otherremark.

`Ah, you should see `em come round me of a Saturday night,'Humpty Dumpty went on, wagging his head gravely from side toside: `for to get their wages, you know.'

(Alice didn't venture to ask what he paid them with; and so yousee I can't tell

`You seem very clever at explaining words, Sir,' said Alice.`Would you kindly tell me the meaning of the poem called"Jabberwocky"?'

`Let's hear it,' said Humpty Dumpty. `I can explain all thepoems that were ever invented -- and a good many that haven'tbeen invented just yet.'

This sounded very hopeful, so Alice repeated the first verse:

`That'll do very well,' said Alice: and "

`Well, "

`I see it now,' Alice remarked thoughtfully: `and what are"

`Well, "

`They must be very curious looking creatures.'

`They are that,' said Humpty Dumpty: `also they make theirnests under sun-dials -- also they live on cheese.'

`Andy what's the "

`To "

`And "

`Of course it is. It's called "

`And a long way beyond it on each side,' Alice added.

`Exactly so. Well, then, "

`And then "

`Well, a "

`And what does "

`Well, "

`I read it in a book,' said Alice. `But I had some poetryrepeated to me, much easier than that, by -- Tweedledee, I thinkit was.'

`As to poetry, you know,' said Humpty Dumpty, stretching outone of his great hands, `

`Oh, it needn't come to that!' Alice hastily said, hoping tokeep him from beginning.

`The piece I'm going to repeat,' he went on without noticingher remark,' was written entirely for your amusement.'

Alice felt that in that case she really

`In winter, when the fields are white,

`I see you don't,' said Alice.

`If you can

`In spring, when woods are getting green,

`In summer, when the days are long,

In autumn, when the leaves are brown,

`You needn't go on making remarks like that,' Humpty Dumptysaid: `they're not sensible, and they put me out.'

`I sent a message to the fish:

The little fishes of the sea,

The little fishes' answer was

`It gets easier further on,' Humpty Dumpty replied.

`I sent to them again to say

The fishes answered with a grin,

I told them once, I told them twice:

I took a kettle large and new,

My heart went hop, my heart went thump;

Then some one came to me and said,

I said to him, I said it plain,

I said it very loud and clear;

`But he was very stiff and proud;

And he was very proud and stiff;

I took a corkscrew from the shelf:

And when I found the door was locked,

And when I found the door was shut,

`Is that all?' Alice timidly asked.

`That's all,' said Humpty Dumpty. Good-bye.'

This was rather sudden, Alice thought: but, after such a

`I shouldn't know you again if we

`The face is what one goes by, generally,' Alice remarked in athoughtful tone.

`That`s just what I complain of,' said Humpty Dumpty. `Yourface is that same as everybody has -- the two eyes, so -- '(marking their places in the air with this thumb) `nose in themiddle, mouth under. It's always the same. Now if you had thetwo eyes on the same side of the nose, for instance -- or themouth at the top -- that would be

`It wouldn't look nice,' Alice objected. But Humpty Dumptyonly shut his eyes and said `Wait till you've tried.'

Alice waited a minute to see if he would speak again, but as henever opened his eyes or took any further notice of her, she said`Good-bye!' once more, and, getting no answer to this, shequietly walked away: but she couldn't help saying to herself asshe went, `Of all the unsatisfactory -- ' (she repeated thisaloud, as it was a great comfort have such a long word to say)`of all the unsatisfactory people I