But Mary spoilt it all, when I sent David back to her in themorning, by inquiring too curiously into his person anddiscovering that I had put his combinations on him with thebuttons to the front. For this I wrote her the followinginsulting letter. When Mary does anything that specially annoysme I send her an insulting letter. I once had a photograph takenof David being hanged on a tree. I sent her that. You can'tthink of all the subtle ways of grieving her I have. No womanwith the spirit of a crow would stand it.

"Dear Madam [I wrote], It has come to my knowledge that when youwalk in the Gardens with the boy David you listen avidly forencomiums of him and of your fanciful dressing of him by passers-by, storing them in your heart the while you make vain pretenceto regard them not: wherefore lest you be swollen by these verysmall things I, who now know David both by day and by night, amminded to compare him and Porthos the one with the other, both inthis matter and in other matters of graver account. And touchingthis matter of outward show, they are both very lordly, andneither of them likes it to be referred to, but they endure indifferent ways. For David says 'Oh, bother!' and even at timeshits out, but Porthos droops his tail and lets them have theirsay. Yet is he extolled as beautiful and a darling ten times forthe once that David is extolled.

"The manners of Porthos are therefore prettier than the mannersof David, who when he has sent me to hide from him behind a treesometimes comes not in search, and on emerging tamely from myconcealment I find him playing other games entirely forgetful ofmy existence. Whereas Porthos always comes in search. Also ifDavid wearies of you he scruples not to say so, but Porthos, inlike circumstances, offers you his paw, meaning 'Farewell,' andto bearded men he does this all the time (I think because of ahereditary distaste for goats), so that they conceive him to beenamoured of them when he is only begging them courteously to go.Thus while the manners of Porthos are more polite it may beargued that those of David are more efficacious.

"In gentleness David compares ill with Porthos. For whereas theone shoves and has been known to kick on slight provocation, theother, who is noisily hated of all small dogs by reason of hissize, remonstrates not, even when they cling in froth and fury tohis chest, but carries them along tolerantly until they drop offfrom fatigue. Again, David will not unbend when in the companyof babies, expecting them unreasonably to rise to his level, butcontrariwise Porthos, though terrible to tramps, suffers allthings of babies, even to an exploration of his mouth in anattempt to discover what his tongue is like at the other end. The comings and goings of David are unnoticed by perambulators,which lie in wait for the advent of Porthos. The strong andwicked fear Porthos but no little creature fears him, not thehedgehogs he conveys from place to place in his mouth, nor thesparrows that steal his straw from under him.

"In proof of which gentleness I adduce his adventure with therabbit. Having gone for a time to reside in a rabbit countryPorthos was elated to discover at last something small that ranfrom him, and developing at once into an ecstatic sportsman hedid pound hotly in pursuit, though always over-shooting the markby a hundred yards or so and wondering very much what had becomeof the rabbit. There was a steep path, from the top of which therabbit suddenly came into view, and the practice of Porthos wasto advance up it on tiptoe, turning near the summit to give me aknowing look and then bounding forward. The rabbit here didsomething tricky with a hole in the ground, but Porthos toreonwards in full faith that the game was being played fairly, andalways returned panting and puzzling but glorious.

"I sometimes shuddered to think of his perplexity should he catchthe rabbit, which however was extremely unlikely; nevertheless hedid catch it, I know not how, but presume it to have been anotherthan the one of which he was in chase. I found him with it, hisbrows furrowed in the deepest thought. The rabbit, terrified butuninjured, cowered beneath him. Porthos gave me a happy look andagain dropped into a weighty frame of mind. 'What is the nextthing one does?' was obviously the puzzle with him, and theposition was scarcely less awkward for the rabbit, which severaltimes made a move to end this intolerable suspense. WhereuponPorthos immediately gave it a warning tap with his foot, andagain fell to pondering. The strain on me was very great.

"At last they seemed to hit upon a compromise. Porthos lookedover his shoulder very self-consciously, and the rabbit at firstslowly and then in a flash withdrew. Porthos pretended to make asearch for it, but you cannot think how relieved he looked. Heeven tried to brazen out his disgrace before me and waved histail appealingly. But he could not look me in the face, and whenhe saw that this was what I insisted on he collapsed at my feetand moaned. There were real tears in his eyes, and I wastouched, and swore to him that he had done everything a dog coulddo, and though he knew I was lying he became happy again. For solong as I am pleased with him, ma'am, nothing else greatlymatters to Porthos. I told this story to David, having firstextracted a promise from him that he would not think the less ofPorthos, and now I must demand the same promise of you. Also, anadmission that in innocence of heart, for which David has beenproperly commended, he can nevertheless teach Porthos nothing,but on the contrary may learn much from him.

"And now to come to those qualities in which David excels overPorthos--the first is that he is no snob but esteems the girlIrene (pretentiously called his nurse) more than any fine lady,and envies every ragged boy who can hit to leg. Whereas Porthoswould have every class keep its place, and though fond of goingdown into the kitchen, always barks at the top of the stairs fora servile invitation before he graciously descends. Most of theservants in our street have had the loan of him to bephotographed with, and I have but now seen him stalking off forthat purpose with a proud little housemaid who is looking up tohim as if he were a warrior for whom she had paid a shilling.

"Again, when David and Porthos are in their bath, praise is dueto the one and must be withheld from the other. For David, as Ihave noticed, loves to splash in his bath and to slip back intoit from the hands that would transfer him to a towel. ButPorthos stands in his bath drooping abjectly like a shamed figurecut out of some limp material.

"Furthermore, the inventiveness of David is beyond that ofPorthos, who cannot play by himself, and knows not even how totake a solitary walk, while David invents playfully all day long.Lastly, when David is discovered of some offence and expressessorrow therefor, he does that thing no more for a time, but looksabout him for other offences, whereas Porthos incontinentlyrepeats his offence, in other words, he again buries his bone inthe backyard, and marvels greatly that I know it, although hisnose be crusted with earth.

"Touching these matters, therefore, let it be granted that Davidexcels Porthos; and in divers similar qualities the one is nomore than a match for the other, as in the quality of curiosity;for, if a parcel comes into my chambers Porthos is miserableuntil it is opened, and I have noticed the same thing of David.

"Also there is the taking of medicine. For at production of thevial all gaiety suddenly departs from Porthos and he looks theother way, but if I say I have forgotten to have the vialrefilled he skips joyfully, yet thinks he still has a right to achocolate, and when I remarked disparagingly on this to David helooked so shy that there was revealed to me a picture of acertain lady treating him for youthful maladies.

"A thing to be considered of in both is their receiving ofpunishments, and I am now reminded that the girl Irene (whom Itake in this matter to be your mouthpiece) complains that I amnot sufficiently severe with David, and do leave the chiding ofhim for offences against myself to her in the hope that he willlove her less and me more thereby. Which we have hotly argued inthe Gardens to the detriment of our dignity. And I here say thatif I am slow to be severe to David, the reason thereof is that Idare not be severe to Porthos, and I have ever sought to treatthe one the same with the other.

"Now I refrain from raising hand or voice to Porthos because hisgreat heart is nigh to breaking if he so much as suspects thatall is not well between him and me, and having struck him oncesome years ago never can I forget the shudder which passedthrough him when he saw it was I who had struck, and I shallstrike him, ma'am, no more. But when he is detected in anyunseemly act now, it is my stern practice to cane my writingtable in his presence, and even this punishment is almost morethan he can bear. Wherefore if such chastisement inflicted onDavid encourages him but to enter upon fresh trespasses (as thegirl Irene avers), the reason must be that his heart is not likeunto that of the noble Porthos.

"And if you retort that David is naturally a depraved little boy,and so demands harsher measure, I have still my answer, to wit,what is the manner of severity meted out to him at home? Andlest you should shuffle in your reply I shall mention a notablepassage that has come to my ears.

"As thus, that David having heard a horrid word in the street,uttered it with unction in the home. That the mother threatenedcorporal punishment, whereat the father tremblingly intervened.That David continuing to rejoice exceedingly in his word, thefather spoke darkly of a cane, but the mother rushed between thecombatants. That the problematical chastisement became to Davidan object of romantic interest. That this darkened the happyhome. That casting from his path a weeping mother, the goadedfather at last dashed from the house yelling that he was away tobuy a cane. That he merely walked the streets white to the lipsbecause of the terror David must now be feeling. And that whenhe returned, it was David radiant with hope who opened the doorand then burst into tears because there was no cane. Truly,ma'am, you are a fitting person to tax me with want of severity. Rather should you be giving thanks that it is not you I amcomparing with Porthos.

"But to make an end of this comparison, I mention that Porthos isever wishful to express gratitude for my kindness to him, so thatlooking up from my book I see his mournful eyes fixed upon mewith a passionate attachment, and then I know that the well-nighunbearable sadness which comes into the face of dogs is becausethey cannot say Thank you to their masters. Whereas David takesmy kindness as his right. But for this, while I should chide himI cannot do so, for of all the ways David has of making me tolove him the most poignant is that he expects it of me as amatter of course. David is all for fun, but none may plumb thedepths of Porthos. Nevertheless I am most nearly doing so when Ilie down beside him on the floor and he puts an arm about myneck. On my soul, ma'am, a protecting arm. At such times it isas if each of us knew what was the want of the other.

"Thus weighing Porthos with David it were hard to tell which isthe worthier. Wherefore do you keep your boy while I keep mydog, and so we shall both be pleased."